Happy Father’s Day, 2022

Avatar Andy B | 19/06/2022 26 Views 0 Likes 0 Ratings

It’s an interesting father’s Day today!

This is the first one since my father died last Autumn (2021). It struck me, suddenly, this morning, that he was no more.

He didn’t want anything to do with me and my family, so we’d been estranged for over a decade. It was what it was, and I was ok with that – you can’t force people to like or love you: I’m not sure how that makes me feel…

Perhaps you’re reading this and have a similarly strange emotion today. Perhaps you loved your dad and he was snatched away before you were ready and breathing felt too great a burden to bear. Perhaps you’ve never known who your biological father is. Perhaps your father was, or is, abusive towards you, or others whom you love. Perhaps your dad no longer remembers your name, through no fault of their own.

You’re not on your own! Let that sink in if you want to skip past this truth!!

Some people have suggested that if you struggle with your relationship with your human father, to see God as a woman. This is beyond unhelpful – so run away from people who suggest anything as unhelpful as that!! God is inherently male in nature, which is why He calls Himself a He, and why Jesus calls His Father, His Father. Take their word for it, not mine.

Rather than seeing God for who He is not, see Him for who He is – the perfect father. Lean in to who He is, not away from the difficult situation you may have faced yourself. He is a Father that cares about your deepest need, and the need you see as irrelevant.

One of my boys wrote in their cards – to me today – how he knew I’d always be there for him, no matter what. That’s what he has learned from the way I father him: correcting, loving, disciplining, pushing, protecting, nurturing him.

I’ll fail at those things, and have done, but my heart is on the right side of the fence – with the effort I put in, and how much he knows I try to do my best for him: I had a similar message from each of my son’s this morning and I cried at those messages. (They were home made, not shop bought, so the messages were created from their hearts not borrowed from a hallmark computer 🙂).

But our heavenly Father never failed, never does fail and never will fail you, or me. That’s not in His nature!

Life rarely turns out as we expect, choose or desire. But if you’re breathing, you have life, and there is hope – because there is a hope that does not depend on situations, or our efforts – or lack of them – or what others can do, or not do, for us…the hope I speak of was decided in a battle that was finished more than 2,000 years ago, right here on earth. It is a victory, and a freedom, that can never be undone.

We often think about Jesus dying on the wooden cross of Calvary as the defeat of death. And that is true.  It was: He did.

But, today perhaps, another victory was assured that is more relevant – the defeat of hopelessness!

Happy father’s Day – whether you can’t see your children because of choices you made, or others made decisions you’re forced to live with. Happy Father’s Day whether this day brings you much joy or sadness. Happy Father’s Day.

And remember that there is a Father that loves you beyond measure!

The photo for this post is a little blurred. It wasn’t taken by a professional. The lighting isn’t great, and the angle would give a real photographer nightmares I’m sure. But I love it – not because of the quality of the image, but because of the quality of the moment we’d just made; we’d just finished moving house, on our own, without enough money, to a place we didn’t know, for a job Jo had been offered. Most of that was terrifying and we didn’t move ‘as you should’. But, let me let you into a secret, there is no such thing as the right way when it comes to being a dad, or moving house…just dig deep, clear your throat and be the man God desires you to be and lead your family well, whatever that may look like to you, in your situation, wherever you are in the world.

Leading your family well may mean you only get to pray for them…but getting on our knees for our family is the best place we can ever be as fathers, because it puts in the right perspective with our own Father, and that is always a good place to be.

Andy B

#celebration #DadsDay #experience #family #father #FathersDay #God #life #son #struggle #theGoodtheBadtheUgly


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Written by Andy B


Comments

This post currently has 9 responses.

  1. Alan Kearns

    19/06/2022 at 14:03

    What a beautiful heartfelt Father’s Day message Andy. Even though I don’t believe in these Hallmark holidays, I do appreciate our kids showing extra love now and again. Maybe my past abuse by my dad has a part to play, but I resolved years ago to be a God fearing and loving dad to our kids despite my background. We need not look far for the perfect Fatherly role model; He is right beside us in Spirit and in His Word. God bless you and your lovely family today brother.

    • BerryBunch.family

      19/06/2022 at 14:10

      Amen my friend. Amen.

      We don’t go big on these days either – we like to celebrate each other all year round.

      Buy it is nice to pause and reflect on things. Besides, Father’s Day means no chores for me 🙂 That’s especially welcome as a stay at home dad for the past 18 years.

      Plus, I get to choose a film to watch together

      Andy B

    • BerryBunch.family

      19/06/2022 at 14:12

      You’re a God fearing man Alan. I see that resolve in you – to be the man of God desires for your wife, your children and grandchildren.

      You’re a great example of a godly father!!

  2. davidsdailydose

    19/06/2022 at 14:06

    Amen, Andy B. Lean in to your Father in Heaven and know He will always be there. This is great advice. I have mixed memories of my earthly father and mixed feelings about being a father to my three sons. But God knows all and He certainly knows best. Enjoy your day with the family! God Bless.

    • BerryBunch.family

      19/06/2022 at 14:14

      Amen. That idea of ‘leaning in’ is a great phrase a godly friend often uses. It’s such a clear picture of how to deal with life, both God and bad – we can’t affect what is, but we can affect what may be and, as you say, God knows best how we can do that.

      Thanks David for your thoughts. They’re truly valuable and appreciated.

      Andy B

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